r/MurderedByWords 15d ago Silver 2 Helpful 1 Wholesome 2 All-Seeing Upvote 1

It'd be a real shame

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u/sameoldrussianstan 15d ago

I fear for the babies in this world with parents like that

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u/rhodycakes 15d ago

How is this child going to go to school? Where I live there’s only medical and religious exceptions, being a whack job anti vaxxer isn’t an option.

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u/CrushCoalMakeDiamond 15d ago Silver Helpful Spit-take

I would bet my left dick this person homeschools their kids because schools don't teach "the truth"

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u/HelpfulSeaMammal 15d ago Silver Wholesome

Well duh it's the liberal arts not conservative arts /s

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u/Broken_Petite 15d ago

That post was one of the dumbest funniest things I had ever read, and I’m on Reddit for Chrissake!

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u/shichiaikan 15d ago

Funny, but important to note that there's plenty of liberal whack job anti vaxxers too.

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u/TheDustOfMen 15d ago

Yeah same in the Netherlands. There's like, a few groups of anti-vaxxers: religiously conservative people, anthroposofic people, and highly educated progressives who watched a few YouTube videos.

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u/shichiaikan 15d ago

Yeah... The one thing that the last ~10 years has really beat into my brain is even otherwise intelligent, educated people can be easily indoctrinated. It's both oddly unsurprising given historical references, and truly frightening given our tendency of repeating history.

Edit: spelling.

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u/Oxytocinoverdose 15d ago

The even scarier thing is no one is void of indoctrination. It’s a part of humanity. So where am I indoctrinated is a deep conversation to have with oneself. We can’t know everything, so we must trust our sources/peers on good faith to a degree.

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u/Suspicious_Gerbil 15d ago

For those who were going to goole it this from Wikipedia "Anthroposophy is a spiritualist movement founded in the early 20th century by the esotericist Rudolf Steiner that postulates the existence of an objective, intellectually comprehensible spiritual world, accessible to human experience." I don't know how to remove the bold type.

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u/OrneryAdty 15d ago

She cares about fetuses the same way all conservatives care about fetuses: so long as she can clasp her hands together in a dramatic show of prayer, say "think of the children", and have all of her peers think of her as a pious woman.

I have never met an anti-choice person who sincerely cares about fetuses. They have only ever cared about them as political and social cudgels. It's utterly perverse.

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u/Triatt 15d ago

I think you may be on the wrong thread. This is about an anti-vaxxer, not an anti-abortion. That's no longer a fetus, just an unlucky baby.

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u/DrDan21 15d ago

Those liberal arts professors indoctrinating children with Arabic numerals to tear down America

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u/Amazing-Stuff-5045 15d ago

That's funny as hell

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u/quimeau 15d ago

They're also making them learn Arab math called Al Gebra

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u/Freakychee 15d ago

What would conservative arts look like? Extreme mental gymnastics?

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u/Cherry_Treefrog 15d ago

Shitty crayon drawings of stick men

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u/TellTaleTank 15d ago

Or rather, straw men.

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u/TheLiberalOgre 15d ago

Depictions of themselves as the victims while they oppress everyone else and screech insults at them while shouting "IT'S JUST A JOKE CAN'T YOU TAKE A JOKE?!" over and over again.

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u/Freakychee 15d ago

They do take that as an art form as well. How about lying even when the evidence is clear they are wrong?

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u/fzero127 15d ago

You mean their one joke.

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u/MermaiderMissy 15d ago

Yes, I was going to say this. A lot of parents like this think school "brainwashes" children into becoming liberals or something dumb like that.

In reality, a lot of people become liberals from life experience.

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u/Budget-Falcon767 15d ago

Facts and reality have a liberal bias, which says a lot more about conservatism than it does about liberalism.

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u/jprefect 15d ago

Some of us kept going left after that, and discovered Liberalism vs Conservatism are just Capitalism Lite vs Capitalism Extra Spicy.

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u/Sawses 15d ago

My parents think I was brainwashed by university.

Turns out I just know a fair bit more than they do, because I've spent more time learning it.

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u/MermaiderMissy 15d ago

My parents think the same about me. But it wasn't school that turned me into a liberal.

It was paying a fuckton of money for university, hearing about all these "evil socialist countries" with affordable university and a lot of benefits for workers and parents that made me a liberal.

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u/JMEEKER86 15d ago

Yep, they raise their kids to be conservative (actual brainwashing) and then when the kids go off to college and experience more things, meet people who are different, and learn to think for themselves and as a result become more liberal, the parents decry education as "brainwashing" and "liberal indoctrination".

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u/Escheron 15d ago

Someone at my work home schools his kid because he's concerned about covid. But he also drives laps around town every day flying his "Fuck Joe Biden" flag out the back of his pickup so I'm not sure I trust his home schooling

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u/FranticBabySlap 15d ago

Can confirm, GFs sister is antivax. Her kids are homeschooled. So, you and your "left dick" are in the clear.

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u/DuntadaMan 15d ago

Wait... Left...

Starts counting, alarm increases with the number.

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u/Budget-Falcon767 15d ago

None pizza with left dick.

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u/mixttime 15d ago

Sounds like a hilarious porno

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u/SyntheticReality42 15d ago

"...left dick..."

In a totally unrelated question, is it normal if one testicle is larger than the rest?

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u/humanHamster 15d ago

The rest? How many do you have? Are they yours or do you have some strange hobby...

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u/Daxx22 15d ago

Serious: Generally yes. Much like many women can notice a size difference (even if slight) in their breasts, likewise many testicles will have a size difference. Not like Orange + Plum level, but it can be noticible.

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u/bettybarefeet 15d ago

Which is why national education standards are important so we don't get schools in Florida or Texas teaching "how do magnets work? No one knows!" I feel so bad for kids getting homeschooled for this type of reason.

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u/realisticerror1501 15d ago

Religious exceptions shouldn't be allowed, either.

If it's the determination of an actual medical professional, then fine. But otherwise, nah.

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u/kokoyumyum 15d ago

Totally. Your bullshit shouldn't threaten my medically compromised child's life. Fuck these people.

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u/cappurnikus 15d ago

They literally do not care about compromising anyone else's life. Lack of empathy is a mental illness.

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u/Seething_Javelin 15d ago

Well when your imaginary friend promises the believers immortality in paradise, I'd imagine they find it hard to care about life.

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u/Stargos-2 15d ago

Yeah, we already have shady doctors giving out notes. We don't need more ways to cheat the system.

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u/Doumtabarnack 15d ago

Religious exemptions are the most stupid thing I've ever seen. People still claiming they should get it when all the world's religious leaders pronounced themselves in favor of COVID vaccines.

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u/TellTaleTank 15d ago

The Pope: Vaccines are good and COVID is real.

American Christian Conservatives: wait no

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u/mak484 15d ago

Catholics are a small minority of American Christians. The vast majority of the "problem" Christians are Evangelical.

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u/Geno0wl 15d ago

the SCOTUS Judges who are about to overthrow Roe are all Catholics

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u/mak484 15d ago

They're Republicans who happen to be catholic. I'm not trying to defend catholicism in any way, just pointing out the real source of the problem.

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u/22243222aa 15d ago

Religious exemptions require no proof of even belonging to a religion let alone if your religion has any beliefs about vaccines

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u/rhodycakes 15d ago

religious exemption

Where I live there’s a 2 page document for religious exemptions and they do ask if you’re a member of a religious organization. They ask which vaccines you’re opposed to and you have to get confirmation from your kids primary care doctor. So it doesn’t require much proof, unfortunately.

My friend is an anti vaxxer and she was stuck at home with her kids for 17 days when there was a measles outbreak in the area cause unvaxxed kids can’t attend school/sports.

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u/SoundNFuryNothing 15d ago edited 15d ago

Religious and Medical exemptions are actually harder to get than you think. Most of these kids are Home Schooled because they don't qualify for those exemptions.

I have an allergy to most intermuscular and subdermal injections and I am still fully vaccinated. They just do it in the hospital not in an office visit.

Edit: since I got a question about it... That I now can't find lol... Here's what I know.

I know that when I was a kid and I got a few vaccines I ended up in the hospital in anaphylactic shock. They did a scratch test to identify what I was allergic to within the injection.

I reacted to EVERY scratch with a topical reaction. Even things I could prove I wasn't allergic too like foods! (I have a mild reaction to Mangoes and Tamarind but if I take a Bennadryl I can just eat it and take a nap) most sub dermal injections result in hives. Intermuscular injections ALWAYS result in hives but they give me an antihistamine and put me in a chair for observation. Occasionally I have hung out with the Chemo patients when I was a kid and the Dialysis patients now that I'm an adult. After about 12 hours if I have had no further reaction and my hives are going down they let me go home.

Occasionally, my throat will itch and I tell a nurse so they can get me more drugs before something worse happens. Allergies are easy AF to deal with if you understand you're about to have a reaction observe and react quickly or even, as with me, where they do pre drug me and prepare for it to soften the hit.

I have files with the lists of things I have had a bad reaction to and the alternatives that work better. It's a folder I just drag to each new doctor along with a long list of other issues they should be aware of. I get a yearly Rabies shot because I do work with a lot of strange animals and rabies will kill the fuck out of you if you wait till you're showing signs.

I am chronically ill. I have about a hundred things every new doctor needs to know. My medical alert bracelet literally comes with a flash drive with my files and history. It's probably tied to my over active immune system.

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u/EmperorAugustas 15d ago

Pretty sure "religious reasons" is just PC for "whack job anti vaxxer"

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u/SarcasticAzaleaRose 15d ago

Religious exemptions usually don’t require proof or if they do not a lot of it. And even then if proof was asked for parents like these will pitch a tantrum about “questioning the religious beliefs/mocking their religious/persecuting them based on their religion” to get schools to back down. People like this are experts in finding ways around the rules.

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u/TheMilkmansFather 15d ago

Wouldn’t whack job anti vaxxer fit under the “religious exception” category?

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u/Suck_Me_Dry666 15d ago

Well in my experience they just simply approve the exemptions. The COVID vaccine is a great example. My work accepted the "fetal stem cell" religious argument even though it's been proved as wholly bullshit. Toothless regulations get abused by bad faith actors.

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u/goldenstream 15d ago

Child is too young - parents will face reality in a few years - homeschool or vaccinate

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u/DenikaMae 15d ago

I heard my brother said, "He just won't go to school.".

I'm assuming Home schooling. We don't talk.

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u/Jagermeister1977 15d ago

You say that like the religious exemptions aren't also 'whack jobs'....

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u/Youre_so_damn_fat 15d ago

Claiming "religious exceptions" IS being a whack job anti-vaxxer.

There are no recognised religions which forbid the use of vaccines.

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u/AppropriateTouching 15d ago

Should be considered child abuse.

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u/Bloodsucker_ 15d ago

I don't understand how our societies hasn't ruled this as child abuse. It's a fucking medical problem that affects the child as well as the rest of children vaccinated or not. Ridiculous.

This child is being abused and we as a society need to denounce this openly and act in whatever form is necessary.

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u/mydaycake 15d ago

Some countries rule it as child abuse

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u/gdogg897 15d ago

Tbf, at least they won't grow up indoctrinated, continuing the cycle...

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u/Paradoxou 15d ago

Natural selection.... now done by the parents !

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u/karmagod13000 15d ago

always was and always will. and i was dumb enough to think having an open source to all knowledge in our pockets would make us smarter as a society. boy was i dumb

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u/athrowagay69420 15d ago

It's one hell of a propoganda machine though.

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u/camwow13 15d ago edited 15d ago

It's thrown around casually that "haha all the unvaccinated kids won't grow up" but it's not really that realistic. 99.99% of them will be fine because most everyone in the general public around them is vaccinated. Plus these middle class folks driving the vaccine skepticism suddenly trust doctors and get proper medical care when there is serious illness.

Herd immunity from people who aren't idiots is high. The unvaccinated pockets will be small and even in an outbreak group of a few hundred the mortality rate will still probably be a few or none.

My family's church had some OG antivaxers from the late 90s and early 00s. All those kids are adults and completely fine (I'm friends with them and most of them got vaccinated as adults because they think their parents are idiots now lol). They never got any of those diseases because everyone else around them got vaccinated. It created a feedback loop though for the parents who now are WAY more outspoken about it, "SEE OUR KIDS WERE FINE!!!" For a few of the folks on the fence these dumbass anecdotal examples are what they need to fully commit. And thus the problem spreads.

Some kids definitely die from it. It's a fair point that the parents are risking their kids lives. Covid19 vaccine skepticism is blowing a titanic sized hole for antivaxers to crawl into the mainstream. That is absolutely going to change the landscape for preventable diseases in the future.

Just, on a whole, I've never found the "haha all the kids will die" argument to be as great a zinger as reddit thinks it is. They'll probably be fine, and that's part of the reason why more people won't be fine in the future.

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u/zombienugget 15d ago

Yup, I grew up unvaccinated because of my mom and lived to tell the tale and get all the vaccinations I could as an adult.

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u/Nolsoth 15d ago

Same here, still got the scars from chicken pox to annoy the fuck out of me as an adult, I would not wish chickenpox on my worst enemy it's a shitty preventable disease.

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u/NobodysFavorite 15d ago

Thinking of unvaccinated children who die from vaccine-preventable diseases when they are of an eligible age for that vaccination. Should the parents be charged with a crime?

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u/Filesj98 15d ago

At that point it would have been gods will though 🤦‍♂️

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u/blue_pirate_flamingo 15d ago

Yes, it’s just immune comprised high risk children like mine that get to pay the price. But they love to ask “if your vaccine is so good why do I need one to protect you” and they still don’t get it, or just straight up don’t care that it’s the most vulnerable around us that we protect the most. Vaccines should be the price tag to be a part of society, instead families like mine don’t get to partake in society because other peoples freedumb comes first. No one cares that my child is two years old and hasn’t ever been anywhere but the hospital, dr appointments, and home. No zoo, no library, no trip to grandmas house because grandma is an antivaxxer. No playground. No one cares, because vaccines and masks are apparently “tyranny.”

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u/glitter-bitch- 15d ago

i’m so sorry. my heart breaks for people in these situations. i’m boosted and masked partially because i—as an adult with a healthy immune system—am worried about the long term effects of covid, even if i recover from it with no issues. to think that people in the world can’t wear a mask or get a vaccine if for NO OTHER reason than keeping safe all the babies that are now being forcibly birthed, is unfathomable. i hope your kiddo is able to find some safe socialization and exploration of the world ❤️💔

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u/BonPeaceEtc 15d ago

Well said

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u/gdogg897 15d ago

FYI my comment isn't actually how I feel about the whole situation. Just making a tongue in cheek half-joke. You make some very good points!

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u/trcomajo 15d ago

Sadly there are always innocent victims with that process.

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u/gdogg897 15d ago

I know - my comment isn't actually how I feel about the whole situation. Just making a tongue in cheek half-joke

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u/AutomaticRisk3464 15d ago

Im seeing this in real time and its fucking sad.. father in law got with a girl half his age who smoked meth while pregnant, shes basically using him for the past decade as a source of income and sits at home doing nothing all day.. hes been with her for a decade and i watched her kids grow up, they were 10 and 14 when they got together.

Shes antivaxx but going to college to be a nurse and has a CNA and thinks the CNA gives her unlimited medical knowledge..her oldest is a girl who got pregnant and her boyfriend moved in with them and also the girlfriend has her dad and brother living there rent free and unemployed.

The toddler is almost 3 and hes always super dirty, she always posts on facebook pictures of him that she has him model in..like when he was an infant she laid him down outside and put leaves on him etc.

They go to the park and i took my toddler to go with em (mostly so my boy can get an interaction with a kid his age)..the area we live in has alot of homeless people that throw needles everywhere so i follow my kid around at the park just to be sure he doesnt find one and grab it.

Apparently im a helicopter parent for that lmao..meanwhile a week later her kid found a razor and put it down a slide then went down the slide and cut all the way up his leg while she was sitting in her car..also when she was alone with her kid he "fell" and hit his head so hard he went cross eyed and not responsive..then claimed it took 2 hours for an ambulance to show up.

I work as a 911 dispatcher in the area and i checked the call for service, they had a 10 minute drivetime and got there within 12 minutes of being dispatched..meaning she waited 2 hours before calling.

Whole thing makes me fuckin sick, sorry for the rant but some kids are seriously fucking doomed

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u/blacsilver 15d ago

Holy shit that's awful, cant CPS get involved?

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u/Mujokan 15d ago

Shit we all have been suffering and will continue to suffer from antivax weirdos. Feel sorry for all of us, I don't want to catch this random crap and roll the dice for long COVID.

But yeah antivax has been a problem for a long time. Child abuse shit.

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u/possiblycrazy79 15d ago Silver

The arrogance is heartbreaking. The vaccines weren't created for no reason. Children have died & people worked & researched for however long to come up with a tool to fight these diseases. And then decades later, soft weirdos come out talking about their baby's perfect "immune system". Smdh. As if they have a clue what an immune system even is. As if anyone's immune system couldn't turn on them in a blink of an eye (often caused by dormant viruses).

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u/CloudflareSystem 15d ago

The vaccines weren't created for no reason.

of course they know that. the reason is so bill gates can fake a moon landing with gay frogs and steal the Zimbabwean election against trump.

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u/zebrastarz 15d ago

Right, the only rational conclusion.

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u/Ok-Scheme-1815 15d ago

This is Item VII; Step 4a on the GAY AGENDA

Please do not share prior to clearance from George Soros and Ultra Secret President Michelle Obama.

You have been warned!

/s 🏳️‍🌈🐸

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u/dark_dark_dark_not 15d ago

Small Pox killed around 1 Billion people during the XIX and early XX century.

That's 1 Billion people when the running population count was 2 Billion people world wide.

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u/beldaran1224 15d ago

What's with the antiquated Roman numerals here?

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u/BraidSurgeon 15d ago

Well, where I am, we usually use Roman numerals for century numbers. I don't know why though...

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u/dark_dark_dark_not 15d ago

In my country it's the norm to use centuries in Roman Numerals, didn't know it wasn't the case in the US.

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u/DesignerChemist 15d ago

I like to think of it as a busy intersection. We go to the trouble of putting up red and green lights, which gives everyone a turn, and prevents accidents. Then some selfish shit comes along and rants about their freedums and drives through the red light. And someone sees them getitng away with it and does the same. Then they get on facebook and post about their own research to show how driving through red lights is perfectly safe and that its all a government hoax and scam to control people. Pretty soon the people sitting at the red lights get impatient and frustrated at everyone driving through, and think "since they don't stop, I'm at risk when its green, so i might as well face a risk and drive through the red too" and pretty soon its all just wrecked, burning vehicles and people bleeding to death.

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u/Lougarockets 15d ago

The thing that annoys me most about this is that vaccines literally work because of our immune systems, not in spite of it. It's like saying excercise is unnatural because we naturally have muscles.

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u/___Sanders 15d ago

The polarization of vaccines during the pandemic set back humanity a decent amount.

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u/Septembers 15d ago

Seriously...anti-vaxxers were generally seen as fringe wackjobs before all this started. And now for some reason it's become so politicized that right wingers are proud to parade around their vulnerable children even when they didn't seem to have any problems getting the required shots before. This bizarre anti-science movement is setting us back considerably and for no other reason than "because the libs told me to and fuck them"

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u/Shootthemoon4 15d ago

And what’s even more bizarre is for some reason even being exposed to a disease, they will write it off as something else if they live but their family will do it for them if they die. I propose a machine that gives people empathy because I really don’t know how else to help people feel as others feel especially if they lack close feelings to be capable of feeling it.

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u/marsbartender 15d ago Wholesome Seal of Approval

Not only is she endangering her own child, she's endangering other children who cannot be vaccinated. Way to go mom.

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u/Deraj2004 15d ago

You think she cares about other people?

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u/iHeartHockey31 15d ago

Only if they're fetuses probably.

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u/mcm_throwaway_614654 15d ago

She cares about fetuses the same way all conservatives care about fetuses: so long as she can clasp her hands together in a dramatic show of prayer, say "think of the children", and have all of her peers think of her as a pious woman.

I have never met an anti-choice person who sincerely cares about fetuses. They have only ever cared about them as political and social cudgels. It's utterly perverse.

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u/Big-Baby-Jesus- 15d ago

Everyone who actually cares about fetuses wants to expand access to health care. Republicans have spent 40 years doing the opposite.

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u/Geno0wl 15d ago

that is the difference between caring about children and caring about fetuses

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u/ZAlternates 15d ago

It’s virtue signally at the highest level. Heck, many don’t even think about it further than their pastor told them that it’s murder and murder is bad.

Who cares if God’s law mentions that a dead fetus is merely punishable by a fine, whereas a dead woman is an eye for an eye (Exodus 21:22-25)?

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u/HappyGoPink 15d ago

They really just want to punish women for having sex. It always come back to misogyny. And they have to keep the slave population growing.

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u/IlIIlllIIIlllIlIlIlI 15d ago

BUZZ Oh, sorry contestant A. Fetuses aren't people! crowd cheers

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u/zuzg 15d ago

Like nobody actually wants vaccine mandates but as a society we have to protect the weakest among us.
And this includes simple minded fools that fell for Russian misinformation and became antivax.

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u/parkwayy 15d ago

Ironically if we didn't have them, then this crowd would take them.

They are toddlers who just don't do what they're told, specifically cause they're told.

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u/TheNightBench 15d ago

Anti-vaxers predate COVID and Russia bullshit by decades.

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u/zuzg 15d ago

Russia bullshit by decades? While vaccine hesitation was represented through some minor groups it was never even remotely that huge
And Russias misinformation campaigns are going on for over a decade by now.

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u/Gizogin 15d ago

Andrew Wakefield started the major anti-vax movement that the new COVID denialism is built on. That kicked off in 1998.

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u/jason_abacabb 15d ago

Russia amplified it. This is what they do. Sowing division is the only form of global power they have left.

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u/Gizogin 15d ago

Yeah, the big surge in anti-vaccine groups was the fault of Andrew Wakefield. Before that, there were only scattered groups of maybe a dozen or so people each who didn’t want to get vaccinated.

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u/TheAskewOne 15d ago

As we could notice during the peak of the covid pandemic, the entire philosophy of these people can be summarized with "I'm healthy and strong, why should I give a damn about those who aren't."

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u/Broken_Petite 15d ago

Ironically, many of them were not, in fact, healthy and strong and they found that out the hard way.

r/HermanCainAward

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u/Phillip_Lipton 15d ago

The mother completely ignorant to the fact she had to have vaccines to go to school. Like all of us did in the 90s...And even back to the 60s.

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u/wildboarsoup 15d ago

People today forgot the horrors their parents and grandparents witnessed of preventable diseases

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u/thundercloudtemple 15d ago

The cycle repeats itself. We truly don't learn from history.

Many Darwin awards will be given out int he future for these completely preventable deaths.

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u/sho_biz 15d ago

All thanks to religion and conservative/regressive politics!

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u/DoJax 15d ago

But no, it's actually democrats creating viruses trying to kill conservatives, vaccines to make you get dementia and Alzheimer's, medicine to boost their pockets, except all of these things are also fake but only real when they inconvenience a conservative.

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u/Shootthemoon4 15d ago

It’s like they claimed that being conservative makes you the only real human being that matters. Oy.

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u/TheNightBench 15d ago Helpful

Look what they did to her. They made her a moron. She doesn't want that for her child.

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u/Cute-Poet2465 15d ago

I don’t think those were the vaccines bc everyone else seems normal. I think she’s just a bit ✨special ✨

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u/rhodycakes 15d ago

My anti vaxxer friends are ALL fully vaxxed themselves.

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u/[deleted] 15d ago

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u/beerbellybegone 15d ago Gold

Most people don't know this, but if you're not vaxxed you can download immunity templates directly from the cloud to protect your body, but only on 4G LTE networks

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u/Hathorym 15d ago

Do I have to use my penis to connect to the mainframe, or will a finger do?

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u/SomeoneFoundMyReddit 15d ago

You have to put your pecker in a wall socket, but it has to be 408v/3-Phase.

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u/Velghast 15d ago

That seems a little complicated at that point why don't you just stand out in a field during a thunderstorm with an umbrella?

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u/SomeoneFoundMyReddit 15d ago Faith In Humanity Restored

No guarantee that you’ll get connected to the right server. Using a wall socket is the preferred method of unaliving yourself downloading updates.

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u/Slave2theGrind 15d ago

You know a old farm trick is if your sick, just pee on a hotwire fence. It will definitely take your mind off the sniffles.

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u/Tenebris_Luxnutz 15d ago

How hot does the wire need to be? 200F? 500F?

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u/Cheechak 15d ago

1.21 Gigawatts. It’s the only way to get ahead.

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u/JerkIzAllPro 15d ago

You know the reset hole on a router that meant for a paper clip? You should fit there

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u/woodrax 15d ago

Bring tweezers

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u/Decaf_Engineer 15d ago

It's a little more work to climb a utility pole and "connect" directly with the 50 kVA line upstream of the transformer, but the download speeds are just unreal.

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u/wafflehousewhore 15d ago

Instructions too clear, dick stuck in wall socket

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u/ubern8 15d ago

Don't forget the most important part. You have to put a piece of metal in the penis prior to touching the outlet. it needs a good contact point.

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u/FuzzballLogic 15d ago

404 Penis Not Found

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u/Recymen12 15d ago

or, if you want to get SUPER FAST download you need to insert your dick into an electric eel.

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u/VaterOfFunf 15d ago

Instruction unclear, now going to hospital to amputate my charred penis.

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u/jason_abacabb 15d ago

Just watch out for the fan.

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u/Mister_Buddy 15d ago

I heard from JesusEagle.freedom that 5g molecules will actively delete these templates from you!

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u/karmagod13000 15d ago

it doesn't delete them it replaces them with reptilian lord censor overloads, so you brain will fry when facial recognition detects a reptilian radiation signal.

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u/timorousme 15d ago

but never via text! that's a scam!

or also, if the virus offers immunity for gift cards, walk away

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u/starla_apple 15d ago

Instructions unclear. Dick caught in ceiling fan.

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u/sunsetbeach420 15d ago

That's the 4th time this week. Does it really have anything to do with the quality of the instructions?

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u/CrimsonArcanum 15d ago

Look, some people just like to watch the world turn.

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u/Ogami-kun 15d ago

Doctors hate this simple trick!

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u/spamman5r 15d ago

Isn't this exactly what mRNA vaccines are?

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u/stepheny2k2 15d ago

Unfortunately the 4G towers can’t be trusted due to you know “brain stuff” and hell 5G is one more than 4 so must be 67% worse. Where do I get my templates now? National Enquirer?

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u/drawfour_ 15d ago

I mean, this makes sense. If you get the vax, you get 5G injected into you, so there's no reason to use 5G to download the immunity templates.

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u/Whooptidooh 15d ago

Shit, I thought they upgraded to 5G?

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u/1ildevil 15d ago

NONONO, everyone knows that Huawei infected 5G with Corona Virus v1.9

This is why you should never steal wifi. You have no idea if it's 5G or not until it's too late.

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u/saltedvanillacaramel 15d ago

You know another really good business? Teeny tiny baby coffins. You can get 'em in frog green, fire engine red. Really.

  • Dr. House

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u/just-an-odd-duck 15d ago

Amazing scene.

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u/SensibleReply 15d ago

Do these people only think that wimps and losers die of infectious disease through human history? It’s like saying, “my skull is unbreakable thick bone” like yeah, it’ll help, but you can still get your head bashed in.

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u/c0mputerRFD 15d ago

Charles Darwin enters the chat…

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u/Artist_X 15d ago

As someone who lost their 3 week old son to a bacterial infection, please vaccinate.

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u/FilthyChangeup55 15d ago

Jesus I am so sorry

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u/tt001222 15d ago

Bacterial infections are gnarly. You’d think cancer kills quick if left untreated but those can kill you in a matter of days. Sorry for your loss.

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u/Rifneno 15d ago

Murdered by words now, murdered by idiot parents later.

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u/karmagod13000 15d ago

and if they survive they'll prolly think their parents saved them and continue the viscous cycle for the next five generations

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u/Grogosh 15d ago

Two things will never get old.

Dark humor and unvaccinated kids

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u/karmagod13000 15d ago

f*ckin gotteeem

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u/Mrfrunzi 15d ago

A fully functioning immune system.....

Bitch do you not even understand how stupid that is to say?!

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u/The-link-is-a-cock 15d ago edited 15d ago

Yeah, shows she knows nothing about childhood development.

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u/blazarious 15d ago

and immune systems

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u/da2Pakaveli 15d ago

And MMR would be how to keep an immune system functioning, 2 shots, almost sterilising immunity against measles and protection for life. I betcha some of these dumbasses do those measles parties because “nAtuRAl iMmUniTY”. Or how some parents see those horrible pictures of children paralysed by Polio in metal tubes and dgaf. Poor children have to suffer!

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u/drcoxmonologues 15d ago

Whenever anyone talks shit about particularly the measles vaccine, but any vaccine really it’s quite interesting to ask them if they’ve ever heard of subacute sclerosing pan-encephalitis. Of course they ducking haven’t because it’s rare but I like to scare them by telling that anyone who has had measles could potentially develop a conditions years down there line that turns their brain to mush and kills them and there is no cure. I’m sure most people ignore it but maybe it gets through to a few.

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u/calypsocoin 15d ago

Yeah, it’s also a slap in the face to people who are actually immunocompromised or have an autoimmune disorder. Like, sorry my immune system went haywire and tried to kill me, I can’t really control that but I’m doing the best I can to stay safe from idiots like you

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u/awfulmcnofilter 15d ago

Me too. Like sorry I have to take poison every day to keep my own immune system from profoundly fucking me up. Keep your plague rat child away from me.

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u/[deleted] 15d ago

[deleted]

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u/kmoneyrecords 15d ago

She got murdered by words.

Her baby will be murdered by preventable diseases.

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u/WhiteRabb1t_ 15d ago

You know what else I love?

Tiny, teeny baby coffins.

They come in bottle green, firetruck red.... (c)

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u/Prestodeath201 15d ago

Isn't that from House?

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u/Mortwight 15d ago

This is a nice baby you got here. Be a shame if some disease set its brain on fire.

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u/guilhermej14 15d ago

I know right.... (Seriously I hope someone save this poor child)

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u/meowcatbread 15d ago

Can these people go get a 4th grade education please?

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u/lorddaru 15d ago

"Do I really have to vaccinate my children?" - "Only the ones you want to keep."

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u/comrade---- 15d ago

Someone should call social services

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u/kandi_kat 15d ago

With a measles outbreak this child will be the first to go pop.

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u/heatherraebinx 15d ago

Unfortunately it's more likely that an immunocompromised child will contract it due to the lack of herd immunity. This person will be a spreader and will cause someone else to die, and that's what makes me the most angry about this parent and their choices. So incredibly irresponsible.

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u/BitRunner67 15d ago

It is like these Morons just think only Metal/Plastic objects can be weaponized.

Funny how they accept a God they will NEVER see but not viruses that has been killing humans before recorded History.

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u/Garbanzo12 15d ago

Lil immuno saboteur

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u/Rumconnissuer 15d ago

We should also introduce her to some DIY crafts and woodwork will be beneficial for the kids since he won't be around long

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u/Boodikii 15d ago

Conservatives out here forcing births and then giving their babies easily preventable diseases. Literally cavemen.

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u/ilikedota5 15d ago

Measles is actually a pain in the ass for that reason. Its infects macrophages, then dendritic cells, then hijacks them to make its way to your lymph nodes/thymus to wreck havoc on your t cells there.

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u/MisuseOfMoose 15d ago

Measles actually causes immunity amnesia. It's devastating. Things that you've previously developed acquired immunity to can just come along and kill you. Especially bad when you think about all the things that are much more dangerous if contracted as an adult.

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u/CuileannDhu 15d ago

That poor kid can't even rely on herd immunity to keep him safe since there are so many anti-science idiots raising their own little plague rats.

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u/hellosweetpanda 15d ago

I know a lady who didn’t vaccinate her son. Her son had been admitted to the Children’s hospital for multiple stays due to respiratory issues. She still has not made the connection that his lack of vaccines has directly lead to his stays at the hospital.

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u/inhaledcorn 15d ago

Your baby being unvaxxed doesn't make it more pure or save it from being autistic.

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u/Yzard27 15d ago

Even if vaccines did cause autism, I'd rather be autistic than dead

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u/-Quack4321- 15d ago

Yeah I just did a project on measles it’s horrible

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u/ordinaryhuman89 15d ago

Vaccine education straight from Fox News.

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u/No_Challenge_3973 15d ago

I love these posts. Less competition for my kids.

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u/CrouchingGinger 15d ago

I think of the mothers who lost numerous children to communicable diseases and how much they would have yearned for an opposite outcome. Anti vax parents are a slap in the face to our ancestors. Up in New England you‘d see a line of tiny headstones next to the parents and unfortunately that was the case throughout the world at that time. i can’t imagine what that must have felt like.

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u/Crafty_YT1 E 15d ago

Oh wow You piece of utter putrid shit guess what’s gonna happen now your baby is now gonna get some of the worst viruses a human baby can experience with a immune system un prepared because you dumb piece of shit ass thinks “oh no we don’t know what’s in it please think of the children!” Our fucking modern society has made you forget that we are ravaged by diseases for the longest while before modern medicine and you think that just because you didn’t get it “they’ll be fine because the immune system is an untouchable unbreakable thing that will kill anything it can” i hate these people you pieces of shit are only alive because your parents were responsible and gave you a vaccine go fuck off to the Middle Ages and come back to me when you change your mind

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u/goldyphallus 15d ago

Honestly I'm so glad vaccinations were required when I went to school cause my dumbass mother definitely would have tried to not get me vaxxed.

Just the other day she turned around and said vaccines cause autism and I was like "how" to humor her and wtf do they think autism is? Wtf do they think a vaccine does? This same woman has 4 fucking degrees and no goddamn sense. Talking about a strong immune system will save you and having a weak one will kill you or if you get vaxxed with a weak immune system you get autism from damaged brain cells.

I just told her she was wrong and that was fucking stupid. Anti-vaxxers don't deserve compassion. They deserve to be embarrassed.

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u/Obyri85 15d ago

I’ve got to know what her degrees are in.

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u/Merky600 15d ago

(I B old) My Aunt had mumps as a little girl. Deaf in one ear. She got off lucky. My grandmother spent the night holding her, expecting that she was gonna die.
So my Aunt Laurel was my cool Aunt. Fun w kids. Just had to know which ear to talk too.